crash
Jahan Z.
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Crash came out of a very intense, very one-sided crush I had on an older boy in one of my classes last year. I was hyper-aware of him in that embarrassing way where the most mundane things suddenly feel romantic—like watching him absent-mindedly flex and unflex his arm while having a conversation. I fixated on small details: the veins in his hands and arms, the way he laughed, the kind of tiny interactions that meant absolutely nothing to him and far too much to me. The piece isn’t about him so much as it’s about that specific kind of delusional, hopeless wanting you get—when you know nothing will happen, but your brain still freaks out. It’s an exaggeration of that feeling on purpose: the drama, the obsession, the self-inflicted heartbreak. God forbid a girl be a little delusional!!
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For me, creativity is an outlet for my emotions. Whenever I feel something that I put into words immediately, I use my art to express it for me.
